“A sparrow, mating with its echo, bred
a fledgling music. I was no one’s bride.
Who knows why summer broke my heart that year?”
- Melissa Green, an excerpt from “The Housewright’s Mercy” The Squanicook Eclogues.
It is well-known that I know what you look like when you sleep. All defenceless. This is not well-known to the world or anyone else in it, naive, perhaps, but well-known to me because I still live with it and see it, even softly, sometimes. And this knowledge does not exist to be remembered. Like so many other things that breathe for a short time that get lost, forgotten, that die and do not go on to be noted.
And they should be noted.
Because what you become is a sum of all those sleeping defenceless faces, because it was my first attempt at love, and because I couldn’t let it go.
When I sat down to write it was because he would be the one to see it and if I put a full stop instead of a comma it was because he understood that he was the need to punctuate it and when I dedicated my first book to him it was because he would be the one to read it. Then no longer did he read it.
I know what you look like when you’re sleeping.
But can you say the same for me. That wasn’t phrased as a question because I know you can’t. For I never slept not when I was with him. Who closes their eyes in a pit with a spitting snake? But also, you could not have found a more perforated victim.
And none of this is original and yet it seems like it is. “Do all lovers feel like they’re inventing something?” Sciamma asks. I never cared for the answer. I just wanted to sleep.
And so, I did the only thing I could. I re-wrote the dedication, then I changed the sheets.
Skinsy fries are good with skinsy wine, but I drank chilled red with these. Sometimes, the itch in a wine benefits from temperature alteration and the afternoon long-shadowed heat coupled against a mouthful of hot fries and demanding ketchup acids, made it perfect. The rose in the salt helps soften things, too.
I think I got the idea for the ketchup from an old Gourmet Traveller issue that I went on to manipulate then taint with spices and smoke - the good things. You’d do well to make a double batch of it, storing it in the refrigerator for later slathering when fries aren’t an option. Sometimes, I don’t even make them myself and order them in instead, just for the sauce and wine alone.
for the rose salt
30 g fleur de sel, a small handful of edible dried rose petals
For the rose salt, put the fleur de sel and petals into a small bowl. Rub the two between your fingertips, working to release the delicate essence of the roses, until the mixture is lightly fragrant. You’ll want to retain some whole petals throughout, so don’t work them in too harsh. Set aside for use. The excess can be sealed and stored in a glass jar for about a month - keep it in a dark place.
for the quince ketchup
100 g quince paste, 30 ml balsamic vinegar, a tablespoon of water, ¼ teaspoon ground paprika, a pinch of ground cumin, a teaspoon of salt, ½ teaspoon of liquid smoke, optional
For the ketchup, put all the ingredients into a blender and blend to a paste. I usually like to let the motor run for less than a minute, aiming to retain some residual coarseness and darkness from the quince but how smooth you want to take it is entirely up to you. The more the motor works, the more homogenous the ketchup gets and the lighter it will be, so keep that in mind, too.
for the fries
2 large russet potatoes (scrubbed well), vegetable oil, (enough for frying)
To make the fries, set a bowl of cold water near to the space where you’ll be working. With a sharp knife, cut the potatoes into fatter than match sticks, tossing them into the water as you go. You’re aiming for shoestring size with about a ¼-inch (.6-cm) width but I always eyeball this part and do it rough instead.
Fill a large heavy-bottomed pot with at least 4-inches (10-cm) of oil, making sure that plenty of room for movement remains at the top as the oil will bubble up rapidly during frying. Attach a deep-fry or candy thermometer and bring to 350 F (180 C) over medium heat. Meanwhile, drain the fries then rinse them again, drying thoroughly on a clean kitchen towel and patting off any residual water. Set a wire cooling rack over a lined baking sheet.
Once the oil is at temperature, fry in small batches until the potatoes are golden brown and crisp, about 5 minutes. You may need to adjust the heat and position of the pan as you work, aiming to keep the temperature as consistent as possible. Remove the fries with a mesh skimmer or slotted spoon and set onto the rack to drain off the excess oil. Toss in as much rose salt as desired then serve soon after with the quince ketchup.
