“The bloom of innocence has long since faded.” – Fyodor Tyutchev, from Selected Poems; “To N.N.”
Atonement, the sea. I call my father, he’s researching the heart. He tells me that it isn’t heart-shaped. I never knew that. Twenty-five years I’ve gone not knowing that. It’s easier to think of it as something soft, sweet, and delicate. All cupid-looking. But it’s not. The heart is rough, hard, and weathered, bleeding. There are veins and ventricles, all kinds of nasty-looking-things they don’t put on hallmark cards. I think about the heart necklace I split with my best friend when we were young, and I think about that same necklace I gave to my next best friend, and the one after that. I think about other halves, and where they all go, and if mine turned to rust. I think about a lot of things. Like the first time I caught a cold, or a fish, or an illness. I think about my first love, and what he’s doing, and who he’s with. My heart is beating again, but for what, I cannot tell. I turn off the light, it feels like a confessional. Summer.
Sea Salt Sablé
280 g (1 cup + 3 ½ tablespoons) unsalted butter, at room temperature
100 g (1/2 cup) granulated sugar
50 g (1/3 cup + 1 tablespoon) confectioner’s sugar
2 teaspoons of fleur de sel
1 egg yolk
seeds from a vanilla bean pod
315 g (2 ½ cups) all-purpose flour
1 egg white, lightly whisked for brushing
70 g granulated sugar (1/3 cup), for rolling
fleur de sel, for finishing
In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, beat the butter, sugars, and fleur de sel on medium speed until pale and creamy, three to five minutes. Add in the yolk, beat until combined, then beat in the vanilla seeds. Pause mixing to scrape down the bottom and sides of the bowl. Set the speed to low and tip in the flour. Beat until a soft dough has just come together.
Scrape onto a sheet of plastic wrap, then with a gentle touch, shape into a taut log that’s about 5-cm’s (2-inches) wide. Chill until firm enough to slice.
When you’re ready to bake, adjust racks in the lower and upper thirds of the oven. Pre-heat to 180 C (350 F). Line two large sheets with parchment paper.
Un-wrap the dough and set it onto a cutting board. Using a pastry brush, coat with a thin layer of egg white, then roll it in the sugar, pressing as needed, to coat. Slice into 1.3-cm (½-inch) thick circles, rolling the log as you go to ensure it is kept as round as possible. Divide between the sheets, leaving a few inches apart for spreading. Sprinkle with fleur de sel.
Bake for 16 to 18 minutes, rotating halfway through, until the edges of the sablé are golden and crisp. Let stand for a few minutes, before transferring off the sheet and onto a wire rack to cool completely, before serving.